Vintage Mustang Forums banner

1 - 7 of 7 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,390 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
Priceless

While I was flying down the road yesterday (only 10 mph over) I noticed a cop with a radar gun.
He was sitting just off the bridge beside a roadway sign.
The cop pulled me over, walked up to the car and asked me, "What's the hurry?"
I replied, "I'm late for work."
"Oh yeah," said the cop, "what do you do?"
I responded, "I'm a rectum stretcher."
The cop said "What.....a rectum stretcher, and what does a rectum stretcher do?"
I said, "Well, I start with one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then
four, then my whole hand, then I work until I can get both hands in there and then I slowly
stretch it until it's about 6 foot wide."

The cop asked me, "What the hell do you do with a 6 foot [censored]?"

I simply replied, "You give him a radar gun and park him on top of a bridge..."

The ticket - - $ 95.00
The look on his face - - PRICELESS!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
698 Posts
It's too bad you hadn't run a stop sign, the cop could have pulled you out of the car, proceeded to start hitting you with his baton and ask, "Do you want me to slow down, or stop."
 

·
AKA Exchevman
Joined
·
5,383 Posts
It's too bad you hadn't run a stop sign, the cop could have pulled you out of the car, proceeded to start hitting you with his baton and ask, "Do you want me to slow down, or stop."

Ouch, LOL
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,390 Posts
Discussion Starter #6
I heard a preacher use that one in a sermon once. Except he was hitting a shinny red import sportscar with the butt of his pistol.

My pet peeve: People who don't stop for stop signs. I've been tapped a few times because of it too. I figure if I stop, I won't run over someone who's not looking, like one of the zillion carpet crawlers in my neighborhood, mine included.
 
1 - 7 of 7 Posts
Top