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Midlife (aka Randy Jacobson, aka James B. Traficant Jr., aka Bubba Budda, aka Superhero, aka Stranger with Candy) has been arrested. Many VMFers knew Midlife worked for the government, but few knew his real name or position. Apparently Midlife's real name is James A. Traficant Jr. and he used to be an elected offical to the U.S. House of Representives. His real hometown is actually Cleveland, Ohio. When asked why he left his hometown Midlife said, "Cleveland Rocks, I called the cops and they wouldn't turn the music down so I left." Authorties believe the real reason is because Drew Carey has horded all of Ohio's Ice Cream is his own personal warehouse. When the Daily Planet questioned people who knew Midlife we discovered some surprising information about him. The following is from and individual who wishes to remain anonomyous.
"I met Midlife at a online car club meeting. I knew right away that there was something not normal about this man. His rude comments and strange behavior threw everyone off guard. Once, he covered himself in Rocky Road ice cream and women's undergarments while singing "Boogity Boogity" from the Ray Steven's song "The Streak." I didn't really suspect he was really James Traficant until he clamed the Devil made him do it. He then started to argue that Johnny's fiddling in "The Devil Went Down to Georgia" was not better than the Devils. I tried to tell him it was just a song and Charlie Daniels was really playing the fiddle. That's when he covered himself in mustard and relish and sung "I'm an Oscar Mayer Wiener." After that, I was certian he was really James Trafficant."
Authorities have asked that if you have any other pictures of Mr. Trafficant then you should please post them here. Although Mr. Trafficant is no longer a threat, there are continuing investigations. If there are any friends or family that would wish to write Mr. Midlife. Please send donations to....
Ohio Valley Medium Security Prison
1966 Amprere Lane.
Volt, OH 46756
Among the requested items:
Soap on a Rope
Harmonica
Mustang Poster
Rocky Road Ice Cream
A pink Flamingo
Razor Sharp Dentures
Titanium Underware
If you know Midlife or recognize him from this picture please call the Daily Planet or Weekly World News as soon as possible!
http://www.politicalusa.com/images/traficant_6.jpg
"I met Midlife at a online car club meeting. I knew right away that there was something not normal about this man. His rude comments and strange behavior threw everyone off guard. Once, he covered himself in Rocky Road ice cream and women's undergarments while singing "Boogity Boogity" from the Ray Steven's song "The Streak." I didn't really suspect he was really James Traficant until he clamed the Devil made him do it. He then started to argue that Johnny's fiddling in "The Devil Went Down to Georgia" was not better than the Devils. I tried to tell him it was just a song and Charlie Daniels was really playing the fiddle. That's when he covered himself in mustard and relish and sung "I'm an Oscar Mayer Wiener." After that, I was certian he was really James Trafficant."
Authorities have asked that if you have any other pictures of Mr. Trafficant then you should please post them here. Although Mr. Trafficant is no longer a threat, there are continuing investigations. If there are any friends or family that would wish to write Mr. Midlife. Please send donations to....
Ohio Valley Medium Security Prison
1966 Amprere Lane.
Volt, OH 46756
Among the requested items:
Soap on a Rope
Harmonica
Mustang Poster
Rocky Road Ice Cream
A pink Flamingo
Razor Sharp Dentures
Titanium Underware
If you know Midlife or recognize him from this picture please call the Daily Planet or Weekly World News as soon as possible!
http://www.politicalusa.com/images/traficant_6.jpg
